Thursday, December 22, 2011

Two Years Later

I had THE most amazing trip to New York City thanks to Make A Wish, Macy's, and The Early Show. I can't wait to tell you all about it (in detail), but first I wanted to tell you about my messy kitchen.

It's 1:30 am and I just finished making fudge. Let's just say it seemed like everything that could have went wrong did. I decided to make a double batch, but I used too small of a pan. It took so long to boil, and then when it did start boiling it bubbled over and was going everywhere. You know how good burnt sugar smells, right? So, mid boil I have to switch pans. I also had to unwrap my sticks of butter and ingredients while continuously stirring, my arm was aching. I was determined not to burn it. Anyway, I was annoyed, trying to think of a way to explain to my Mom why her kitchen looked like this when I got a text message. My Mom had text me "Happy Birthday!" I had completely forgotten. When you have a transplant they consider the day of your transplant to be your second birthday because it's your second chance at life; a new beginning. I had my transplant two years ago today.

I have been a little aggravated about my medical situation since I got back from New York. Everything surrounding school and raising awareness has been amazing, but I am struggling with graft vs. host disease. I've tried tapering my medication four times and it feels never ending. One unsuccessful taper and flare of GVHD after the other. It feels like taking a step back when I am so ready to move forward.  I am always thankful, but somewhere along the way I got caught up in my "messy kitchen" of life and forgot that regardless of the GVHD, I wake up every morning and get to live my life. Two years ago, I didn't know if I would make it to be 18, if I'd get to go to college, or even if my hair would grow back!

And today, here I am, sitting in a messy kitchen with short brown hair thanking God for the past two years of miracles.

Also, I want to say thank you all for your continuous love, prayers, and support over the past few years.  You have been by my side every step of the way.

7 comments:

  1. Wow I feel like just yesterday was your first birthday!!! HAPPY BIRTHDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 2 years old now! Now I say this in the nicest way possible...you are not much of a cook. But I love you anyway! We will just push this one aside like the ham situation ;) But I really like how you used the analogy of a messy kitchen to your life right now. That creative writing class is doing you well! haha! I love you so much you're always in my prayers :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. Oh Ceci!! You always find the right words and make us realize what we all have. So glad you enjoyed it and I'm sure the fudge was just fine too. :) We think of you all the time and love hearing how the climb is going. Wishing you a very Merry Christmas and Happy Birthday too!! We love you Ceci!!!
    The McCord Family

    ReplyDelete
  3. Dear Ceci: Even a life well lived gets messy and stinky at times. God even tells us that (John 16:33). In God's recipe book for living he gives us much instruction as to what ingredients, what order and in what amounts to mix things, but He also leaves a lot of decisions up to us. Like, how big a batch to make, what pan to use, when and where to make it etc. I thank God for that freedom and that we aren't required to be merely puppets! But with that freedom God also knew we would fail and make life messy and stinky at times (Rom 3:23). God provides the ultimate cleanser to clean up our messes though (Rom 5:8, John 3:16). Fortunately when we fail and life gets messy we aren't kicked out and banned from the kitchen! God simply sends in His cleaning service when we ask and we get to continue on and try again (Rom 6:23)! Keep looking forward and climbing!! joe
    P.S. Thank God for Jesus, Mothers and Formula 409!

    ReplyDelete
  4. How did the fudge turn out? My mouth is watering. I would like a piece right now! Ceci, you are so very impressive........your determination speaks volumes to all of us and encourages us as well as making us so very proud of you! I needed that "messy kitchen" analogy......I think you should have your own talk show!! Thank you so much for allowing us to be on your CLIMB with you. Much love, Rexie & Kathy

    ReplyDelete
  5. Love stopping in on your blog to get caught up on what you are doing! I saw a little girl on her bike this week in Chandler that was a spitting image of you at ten. She had the most engaging smile....thought of you immediately and remembered your happy smile from elementary school! Keep making those messes (fudge) because it shows that you have the physical and emotional strength to be doing normal, everyday stuff! You are in my thoughts and prayers always! Sue Somero

    ReplyDelete
  6. Seriously, Ceci! I hope you're in the process of writing a book and we just don't know about it yet! Your blog entries are always so well-written, and I loved the analogy! Rick was saying that he prayed with you and talked to you before they left Arizona, and that you quoted a scripture to him. I knew without a doubt, before he even said what the verse was, that it had to be John 14:27. And sure enough, it was. I even have written in my Bible beside that scripture, "Ceci's Verse." I pray that you and your family will all feel that peace. I love you, Ceci! Jena Belle

    ReplyDelete
  7. Dear Ceci, Sorry I have not been good lately in reading anyone's blogs or keeping up on facebook. We continue to pray for miracles and peace in your life. Have you ever stopped to think how many of us are better people because of you? God is perfect. He has a plan. Someday we will be able to see the full picture. . . . . .Hang in there. We love you! Richard and Tamara in WA!

    ReplyDelete