Thursday, September 8, 2011

Anesthesia Bliss

The white corridor before the bliss.
Time is just flying by. I’ve been taking classes at Chandler Gilbert! I love it, but school and my full time job, being a patient, keeps me busy. Somehow I manage to fit a precious nap in everyday!

Medically, things have been confusing lately. My hemoglobin (red blood cell) level changes so drastically. One day I was at Phoenix Children’s and my hemoglobin was 10.2 and three hours later at Mayo Clinic it was 9.4. Typically hemoglobin doesn't fluctuate that much within a day, and definitely not within a few hours (unless you are bleeding). They think it was possibly a lab error. Not very reassuring, considering I had a transplant based on these labs! This is where I would laugh nervously and try to pass my comment as a joke, but underneath every joke lies a morsel of truth. Anyways, we are trying to get to the bottom of it. I am having a bone marrow biopsy tomorrow morning, at 8am. I am excited for two reasons. Number one, a biopsy is a much better evaluation of what’s going on inside my marrow. And number two, I love anesthesia. There is something scary about waving goodbye to your parents as they wheel you down this white corridor. I pray as they wheel me into the sterilized room with bright paintings on the walls. It reeks of antiseptic and they play pop music over the loudspeaker. There is a tiny white bed in the middle that appears to be covered in bubble wrap. Machines are beeping and purring on each side of me. They move me to the bed and begin to draw labs and apply the heart monitor stickers. They check my wrist band and hook me up to IV fluids, blood pressure cuff, O2 Sat, and every medical machine you can imagine. The room is eerily cold as the doctors attempt small talk, “Where do you go to school? Have you had a biopsy before? etc”. And finally they take a pink and clear muzzle looking contraption and cover my mouth. He tells me he’s giving me the sedative laced with ketamine and I peacefully drift off to sleep unlike my usual fight to get to sleep every night. Everyone thinks I’m so weird and my Mom claims I will be addicted to it soon. But, at least I am excited about a part of the procedure considering I am going to be jabbed in my right hip with a large needle.

It’s scary feeling like I’m in the same situation I was 2 years ago. Each appointment I anxiously wait to hear what my hemoglobin level is praying that my counts will miraculously improve. However; this time around I am in such a better place mentally, physically, medically, and spiritually. Finally, I have learned that worrying won’t change it. “Peace I leave with you, my peace I give you. I give to you not as the world gives. Do not let your heart be troubled and do not be afraid.”-John 14:27

*I promise I will update you soon about all of the the exciting things happening like SAT tests, college, and my 18th birthday!

5 comments:

  1. LOVE that verse. love love love love love. oh and yeah, I love you too :)

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  2. Oh my Carolyn, I love you :) As far as your love for anesthesia, at least you've found something to look forward to! My heart will be with you tomorrow morning, along with my thoughts and prayers. You and Chels have to help me study for those scary SATs! 18!!!!! I'm so excited :D You'll be able to order things off the tv and hit the clubs! Carolyn Christenson, Legal Adult . . . Has a beautiful ring to it :) You will definitely look good in an "I voted!" sticker :) Until we meet again (aka when you'll be tutoring me so I can make it to college like you!) My love for you is like Karissa's love for Carolyn! Yeah, THAT much :) Love you, miss you!

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  3. Love you and pray for you dear Carolyn. Sorry I have not been good about keeping up with your blog. You continue to inspire us always. Hugs from WA! Richard and Tamara

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  4. Ceci, I'm excited about you taking classes. I hope the test results were good news. I wanted to tell you that the LLS, Team In Training, West Valley Chapter ran in your honor today. Your spirit is always with me when I run. (I hope that doesn't sound to weird)Looking forward to taliking to you in the future. Katherine Gomez

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  5. Ceci, I am amazed at all you have been thru-you know so much more than most of us; you have gone thru so much more than most of us; you teach us; you lift us up from our downs; you still manage to find humor and keep a good attitude!!! We are praying for you. Much love, Kathy & Rexie

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