Tuesday, March 9, 2010

Humble Pie (Sugar Free)

Well, it’s been an entire week since I’ve seen the brightly colored walls and inhaled the aroma of PCH. Which is a combination of alcohol wipes and medicine. I didn’t miss it for a minute. Well, it has cut down on my social outings.

As much as I know I should be focusing on the present my mind can’t help but wander into the future. I’ve been doing what I do best; planning and organizing. Planning trips and a lot of work for Ceci’s Climb. I’ve been applying for grants, writing letters, starting the website, etc. It’s something I’m really excited about.

Something I’m not necessarily too excited about is world studies online! No, it’s not that bad. I’m just adjusting to school again. It’s a great step forward. Plus, I’ve been working on those thank you’s. Sorry, I promise they are coming! I really, truly am thankful!

My counts were all hanging on. No star and no failure today. My hemoglobin was 10.4, ANC-1,740, WBC-2.6, and Platelets-117. They’re looking good! Even my glucose (sugar) was in a normal range. The only thing was my creatine level was slightly increased. A simple fix-drink more.

The better I feel; the worse it is to sit and wait. And that was definitely apparent this week. So technically, it’s a good and bad thing I’ve been bored. The doctors sensed my boredom. They say it happens to all of the kids. They told me they had given me permission to go to Ryan’s games. Although I do really enjoy the games, I had to remind them it was a once- a-week affair. It’s hard to explain, but sometimes they think they are giving you a mile when really it’s only an inch. But an inch is still an inch! I guess what bothers me is that I can’t have it all back. I know waiting will only make it that much sweeter, but it doesn’t make it all that great in the meantime. Haha suck it up, Carolyn. They asked me what I wanted and I said “everything”, I don’t want to do something to harm me, but a little room to move would be nice. So they promised me they’d think about it.

I was feeling bad for myself until what came next. Baby Walter, the 8 month old boy who also had MDS, passed away last night. It was a moment of realization that my “problem” was petty. I know I’m allowed to complain but I am so blessed to be alive and thriving. Who cares if I’m not out every Friday night? I’m surrounded by my family and the people I love. And I am so thankful for that. Whether you’re eight months old, sixteen, or sixty, life is precious. So thank you baby Walter for reminding me.

A fellow fighter.

5 comments:

  1. I'm so sorry to hear about Baby Walter :( He was so strong for his age. You helped him out so much, though, with "Ceci's Climb". At least he is no longer in pain.

    StuCo loved their thank you, by the way! They got all excited! Your professional card and what not tricked them for a second, and they thought that it came from someone that worked for you :)

    As for world studies, if you need any help, I might have some study guides for the finals, and other papers from summer school that might help if you want to take a look! I just have to locate them . . .

    I'm glad to hear you're doing better, as always. Yay for big numbers! I love you to every star and back! One million times!

    You're in my thoughts always,
    Karissa

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  2. ceci: When you have been climbing each time you go to clinic, it's a little disheartening to level off isn't it. We will take those numbers this week, but expect better next week! We have talked that we do not know all we would like to know about Heaven, but I can only imagine that Grandpa is loving on Baby Walter!!! Gammie says: "Everything comes to him who waits, if he works while he waits." Ceci that is exactly what you are doing. I am so proud of you and love you so much.

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  3. Oh, Baby Walter's picture is sooooo cute---I see why you loved him--I'm praying for his family. And, you are so right---life IS precious----we all need to be reminded of that, so thanks! By the way, are the doctors going to allow you to go to all of Allan's games next week???? Hope so! We will be thinking of you all and wishing we were there, too. You just keep planning and organizing and drinking---we're praying. Much love, Kathy & Rexie

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  4. Thanks Ceci for your amazing posts. Because of people like you and Baby Walter all of us are better informed about MDS. . . . .Now with all your planning and organizing you are going to influence and inform more people. Yes, one person can make a HUGE DIFFERENCE. . . .and you are already proving this to the world! Hugs from cold WA!

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  5. Hello Ceci!!!

    So nice to get your posts as always..I run out of time to respond lately, but know I am always reading. Thanks for sharing Baby Walters picture..we sent a prayer up for him and his family. We are thrilled you are doing well and we think of you often!!! Much love to you Ceci!!! Love, The McCord Family

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