Tuesday, December 29, 2009

I'm baaaack!

As I sit here and listen to "The Climb" for the billionth time I can't help but bob to the rhythm and smile. When I'm in pain, like I have been frequently, I start to sing. "Ain't about how fast I get there. Ain't about what's waiting on the other side."Mmm it just comforts me. There is one part I disagree with though..."my faith is shaking". My faith is stronger than ever. God has blessed me with so much. This experience has only made that more clear to me.

Each day I feel stronger and more excited. Each day I also feel a lot of pain. Believe me, everyday is a struggle. The struggle is physical and mental. But somehow; at the end of each day the strength and good overcomes the pain.

Three weeks ago I wanted to be anywhere but home. Today, I don't want to be anywhere but home. However; my pink palace is as close as I can get right now. It's day +6. The doctors all seem to say everything happening is expected. The nausea, the pain, the mucus. We find it both encouraging and annoying they predicted this.

I'm not eating too stealthily these days. I eat what feels good on my throat and what my stomach can handle. I get veggies (TPN) every night to keep my body stable.They're warned us that the food I eat now may not taste good later. I'm a popsicle girl lately!

Regarding meds, the list is long and fluctuates daily. I'm constantly hooked up to the pole. Personally; I think they're afraid I'll run. Dr. Adams says it is to early to see graft vs host but never to early to prepare for it. For now, we are just waiting for "Ryan" to make his way to my bone marrow and unpack.

Grandpa is checked into another hospital tonight. He's on pain meds and will hopefully have a restful night! (What's with this family and the hospital?) We are expecting test results tomorrow.


  1. Glad to have you back...

  2. So good to have you back and thanks for all the details. We will include Grandpa in our prayers too. Hugs from WA!

  3. Hi Ceci! So glad to hear you're feeling better each day! I see that your humor is still in tact..you definitely have a flair for writing Girl. Your updates are great and always manage to make me smile at your bravery and faith. It is a testament to our God and the power of prayer. I look forward to the next update and will pray for your Grandpa as well. Love, Kindra

    YAY! I am so very glad you're back! (but you're Aunt Jane did a fabulous job keeping us updated THANKS!)You are such a trooper! I am thrilled to hear things are going as expected; but I am sorry to hear it causes you pain. I wish i could take your place somehow...I hope you know I'd do it in a heartbeat if i could. I love you so much and will continue to pray for your Grandpa.
    love naomi

  5. I love you girl. I still listen to that song too!! I agree your faith is strong and getting stronger. I love you always remember that because i will never let you forget it!! Keep on moving :)